Nice Being You, Extros!

Hello, hello!

Wow, what a month! Let’s catch up, shall we?

For the past three weeks, I, a self-professed introvert, embarked on an unexpected adventure.

It all began with a great writing program and the “vibrant” Red Sea Film Festival. Now, I knew these two events, especially with them overlapping, would cause me so much emotional turmoil, but little did I know they would unveil a whole new side of myself. As I sit here, SOCIALLY DRAINED, I find myself reflecting on the eye-opening journey of acting as an extrovert. (AAAH!)

The writing program was my first taste of pushing boundaries. Surrounded by fellow creative souls, I felt compelled and happy to engage, share my ideas and actively participate in daily social endeavors. Surprisingly, the more I stepped out of my comfort zone, the more I realized how capable and confident I could be in these social settings, (once I’m picked up and thrown into them, once I have no other choice but to do them).

As part of the program, an event was organized for us participants, providing an opportunity to meet with investors, producers and prominent companies to pitch our projects *eye-roll*. Pitching has always been a dreaded aspect for me in this industry, but surprisingly, I found myself actually enjoying it this time. Rather than the usual format of presenting our projects individually in an office filled with “formal suits”, they arranged a pleasant party where we could all mingle and engage in casual conversations about our projects. That was one great experience. 

In the same week, the Red Sea Film Festival was also happening, that’s where I found myself in a whirlwind of fascinating conversations and encounters with new, cool people as well. As I allowed myself to be open and approachable, I discovered the joy of genuine connections. Engaging in conversations that flowed effortlessly and being part of a community of like-minded individuals brought a sense of belonging I hadn’t experienced in a long long time.

Throughout my life, anxiety had convinced me that social interactions were something to be feared. However, after these experiences, I realized that my anxiety had been lying to me for years. I discovered that I am, in fact, a fun and engaging person, capable of making others laugh and feel at ease. The more I challenged my anxious thoughts, the more I uncovered the vibrant essence within. Also, I am SUCH a good actor! That whenever I’d throw the good ol’ “I’m an introvert” everyone would be like “what? you? noway!”. (Psst, directors, put me in your movies. jk. please don’t.)

Acting as an extrovert shifted the way I think people are treating me. The initial reserve that often comes with being an introvert (which I highly believe was totally just in my head) was replaced with genuine interest and enthusiasm from others once I allowed it. I noticed that people were eager to initiate conversations, include me in their plans and even seek my opinions. It was a reminder of the transformative power our external demeanor can have on the perceptions of those around us, reciprocating and exchanging energies.

However, perhaps the most profound discovery was the positive shift in my own self-perception. By embracing the extroverted side of my personality, I saw myself through a new lens. I realized that I possessed the qualities I had previously felt I lacked – charisma, humor and the ability to captivate an audience. It was such a liberating experience that boosted my self-esteem and allowed me to appreciate the multifaceted nature of my being.

Now, as I find myself socially depleted, I am reminded of the importance of balance. While acting as an extrovert has been an enlightening journey, I am ready to retreat back into my cocoon for a while…

I will cherish the memories, connections and lessons gained from my time in the extroverted realm.

But for now, I am grateful for the self-discovery and the reminder that our true selves hold boundless potential!

***Disclaimer: I am currently grappling with the looming presence of an insidious monster that we all know and LOVE as “Imposter Syndrome.” We’re negotiating as I write this, but be ready for an entry about that soon.  

Ba bye!

FFB